14 Celebrities That Chelsea Handler Has Attacked

When it comes to Chelsea Handler it seems like nobody is safe from her jokes, especially when they are hot in the news at the moment. Because of this Zimbio have come up with a list of 14 celebrities that Chelsea has gone in on.

Angelina Jolie

One of the most venomous of Chelsea’s diatribes was directed at actress Angelina Jolie. In a 2010 New Jersey standup performance, Handler ranted, “She can rescue as many babies from as many countries as she wants to. I don’t f**king believe you … she gives interviews, ‘I don’t have a lot of female friends.’ Cause you’re a f**king c**t … you’re a f **king b**ch.”

MTV’s Teen Moms

While Chelsea hasn’t directed any disses at any of the individuals on 16 and Pregnant, she’s made it clear that she isn’t a fan of the Teen Mom phenomenon. “Getting rewarded for being pregnant when you’re a teenager? Are you serious? I mean, that makes me want to kill somebody,” Handler told the New York Times.

Tori Spelling

Chelsea has trashed Tori Spelling innumerable times on her show, prompting Tori to joke, “I want to thank you for finding ways to say I’m ugly and stupid, week after week” at the 2009 Bravo A-List Awards. Handler responded, “I want to thank her for being able to take a joke. I’m going to try my hardest not to tell her she looks like a man anymore. It’s not nice. Even if it’s true, it’s not nice.”

Heidi Montag

Chelsea dislikes Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt so much, she won’t have them on her show. But she will make fun of them. Once, after airing a clip of Montag’s beachy music video, Chelsea exclaimed, “While I was watching this I was hoping a giant jellyfish would leap out of the ocean and sting one of her big, fake boobies!”

Kim Kardashian

Chelsea Handler shares a network with Kim Kardashian, which perhaps explains how Kim has managed to avoid too much scrutiny on Chelsea Lately. Still, she did have her brother recite the lyrics to Kim’s mega-fail single “Jam (Turn It Up)” on air, highlighting the masterful lyricism of Kim’s first musical opus.

Lindsay Lohan

In June 2010, Chelsea ran a skit about Lindsay Lohan’s family visiting the actress in prison. In the skit, Dina (played by Chelsea) spirited cocaine, cigarettes, a bottle of Belvedere and Samantha Ronson into prison using her, uh, private parts (ew). Lindsay must not have been terribly insulted, however, as she filmed a cameo for Handler’s hosting gig at the MTV VMAs just three months later. Too bad it wasn’t all that funny.

Perez Hilton

After the 2010 MTV VMAs, Perez Hilton wrote that Chelsea “didn’t really pull it off…For the most part, we were bored and just hoping she would shut the hell up so we could hear more music.” Chelsea took to Twitter to write, “Oh, f**k off. I had a blast and the show awesome last night. Bomb? Your life is a bomb.”

Jay Mohr

Sober comedian Jay Mohr tweeted in March 2010, “Just saw Chelsea Handler in the lobby of my hotel. She was so drunk she could hardly walk. I think someone has a wee bit of a problem.” Handler countered, “Jay Mohr thinks I ‘stumbled’ past him last night. There’s a big difference between stumbling by and just not interested.”

Michelle ‘Bombshell’ McGee

In the wake of Jesse James’ cheating scandal, Chelsea wrote in her blog of James’ mistress Michelle McGee: “Denny McGee said that Michelle really believed that Sandra and Jesse were separated and was “shocked” to see them together at the Oscars. I guess she doesn’t read magazines, which makes sense since she basically has one on her face.”

Kirstie Alley

In her explanation of why she’d never be on Dancing with the Stars, Chelsea told Joy Behar, “[I] can’t even watch it. I mean, obviously I had to watch when Kirstie Alley was on because I had to see what was going to happen to the floor, but I just… I can’t watch that show.”

Mariah Carey/Nick Cannon

In October 2010, Handler tweeted, “I just heard Nick Cannon is starting a comedy tour. Who’s going to do the comedy?” Cannon fired off a series of tweets in retaliation, calling Handler “ugly white trash.” The two later worked things out in person, and Cannon explained that he’d already been offended by a joke Handler had made about Nick’s wife, Mariah Carey—namely that she looked like she could be Nick’s mother.

John Mayer

Chelsea must have hit a nerve when she joked of John Mayer, “I liked him before he started talking. I liked his singing, and then he ruined it with talking. It’s just like if I started to sing, you got that d**chebag?” Mayer took to his now-defunct twitter to write, “I’m trying to figure out why Chelsea Handler has such seething hatred for me. I must remind her of someone she knows and doesn’t like.”

The Jonas Brothers

Chelsea has poked fun at the Jonas Brothers many a time, most notably with a February 2010 skit in which Taylor Swift (played by Chelsea) visited the brothers backstage before one of their shows, bragging about how she’s going to find dudes without purity rings.

Paris Hilton

In 2009, Jenny McCarthy and Chelsea Handler shared the story of an encounter with Paris Hilton at the Bravo A-List Awards. It wasn’t complimentary. Beforehand, Chelsea quipped, “I’ve actually met her before but she doesn’t know when she’s met someone before ’cause she’s so stupid.”

I’m not a big fan of Chelsea, I think she can seem quite bitter and unfunny at her jokes some times but I’m not going to lie some of these did make me laugh.

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