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Ashton Kutcher Works Out For Armageddon

And not the movie, “Armageddon”, either!

Apparently, Ashton Kutcher wants to save his family from the end of the world — so he works out in preparation. No, you really can’t make this stuff up!


Ashton appears on the front cover of the new “Men’s Fitness” and talked to their reporter about the apocalypse. He says that when the crap hits the fan, it will boil down to the survival of the fittest. He says that when he’s jogging up Runyon Canyon near his home, he pretends that he’s being chased by wild animals. He endures hours of Bikram yoga and pretends he’s in a desert without water…and why? It’s because of the upcoming apocalypse! Of course.

He said, “If the sh*t hits the fan, you can get out of the sh*t.” Fine wisdom there, pal. He went on to reveal that his purpose is to save his family from Armageddon. He said, “It won’t take very much, I’m telling you. It will not take much for people to hit the panic button. The amount of convenience that people rely on based on electricity alone. You start taking out electricity and satellites, and people are going to lose their noodle. People don’t have maps anymore. People use their iPhones or GPS systems, so if there’s no electricity, nobody has maps. And people are going to go, ‘That land’s not your, prove that it’s yours’, and the only thing you have to prove it’s yours is on an electric file. Then it’s like, ‘What’s the value of currency, and whose food is whose?’ People’s alarm systems at their homes will no longer work.”

He went on to say, “Neither will our heating, our garbage disposals, hot-water heaters that run on gas but depend on electricity – what happens when all our modern conveniences fail? I’m going to be ready to take myself and my family to a safe place where they don’t have to worry.”

Someone’s been smokin’ the cray-cray sauce!

source: Ashton Kutcher works out to save his family from Armageddon (really) – [celebitchy]

 
 


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