When it comes to Chelsea Handler it seems like nobody is safe from her jokes, especially when they are hot in the news at the moment. Because of this Zimbio have come up with a list of 14 celebrities that Chelsea has gone in on.
Angelina Jolie
One of the most venomous of Chelsea’s diatribes was directed at actress Angelina Jolie. In a 2010 New Jersey standup performance, Handler ranted, “She can rescue as many babies from as many countries as she wants to. I don’t f**king believe you … she gives interviews, ‘I don’t have a lot of female friends.’ Cause you’re a f**king c**t … you’re a f **king b**ch.”
MTV’s Teen Moms
While Chelsea hasn’t directed any disses at any of the individuals on 16 and Pregnant, she’s made it clear that she isn’t a fan of the Teen Mom phenomenon. “Getting rewarded for being pregnant when you’re a teenager? Are you serious? I mean, that makes me want to kill somebody,” Handler told the New York Times.
Tori Spelling
Chelsea has trashed Tori Spelling innumerable times on her show, prompting Tori to joke, “I want to thank you for finding ways to say I’m ugly and stupid, week after week” at the 2009 Bravo A-List Awards. Handler responded, “I want to thank her for being able to take a joke. I’m going to try my hardest not to tell her she looks like a man anymore. It’s not nice. Even if it’s true, it’s not nice.”
Heidi Montag
Chelsea dislikes Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt so much, she won’t have them on her show. But she will make fun of them. Once, after airing a clip of Montag’s beachy music video, Chelsea exclaimed, “While I was watching this I was hoping a giant jellyfish would leap out of the ocean and sting one of her big, fake boobies!”
Kim Kardashian
Chelsea Handler shares a network with Kim Kardashian, which perhaps explains how Kim has managed to avoid too much scrutiny on Chelsea Lately. Still, she did have her brother recite the lyrics to Kim’s mega-fail single “Jam (Turn It Up)” on air, highlighting the masterful lyricism of Kim’s first musical opus.
Lindsay Lohan
In June 2010, Chelsea ran a skit about Lindsay Lohan’s family visiting the actress in prison. In the skit, Dina (played by Chelsea) spirited cocaine, cigarettes, a bottle of Belvedere and Samantha Ronson into prison using her, uh, private parts (ew). Lindsay must not have been terribly insulted, however, as she filmed a cameo for Handler’s hosting gig at the MTV VMAs just three months later. Too bad it wasn’t all that funny.
Perez Hilton
After the 2010 MTV VMAs, Perez Hilton wrote that Chelsea “didn’t really pull it off…For the most part, we were bored and just hoping she would shut the hell up so we could hear more music.” Chelsea took to Twitter to write, “Oh, f**k off. I had a blast and the show awesome last night. Bomb? Your life is a bomb.”
Jay Mohr
Sober comedian Jay Mohr tweeted in March 2010, “Just saw Chelsea Handler in the lobby of my hotel. She was so drunk she could hardly walk. I think someone has a wee bit of a problem.” Handler countered, “Jay Mohr thinks I ‘stumbled’ past him last night. There’s a big difference between stumbling by and just not interested.”
Michelle ‘Bombshell’ McGee
In the wake of Jesse James’ cheating scandal, Chelsea wrote in her blog of James’ mistress Michelle McGee: “Denny McGee said that Michelle really believed that Sandra and Jesse were separated and was “shocked” to see them together at the Oscars. I guess she doesn’t read magazines, which makes sense since she basically has one on her face.”
Kirstie Alley
In her explanation of why she’d never be on Dancing with the Stars, Chelsea told Joy Behar, “[I] can’t even watch it. I mean, obviously I had to watch when Kirstie Alley was on because I had to see what was going to happen to the floor, but I just… I can’t watch that show.”
Mariah Carey/Nick Cannon
In October 2010, Handler tweeted, “I just heard Nick Cannon is starting a comedy tour. Who’s going to do the comedy?” Cannon fired off a series of tweets in retaliation, calling Handler “ugly white trash.” The two later worked things out in person, and Cannon explained that he’d already been offended by a joke Handler had made about Nick’s wife, Mariah Carey—namely that she looked like she could be Nick’s mother.
John Mayer
Chelsea must have hit a nerve when she joked of John Mayer, “I liked him before he started talking. I liked his singing, and then he ruined it with talking. It’s just like if I started to sing, you got that d**chebag?” Mayer took to his now-defunct twitter to write, “I’m trying to figure out why Chelsea Handler has such seething hatred for me. I must remind her of someone she knows and doesn’t like.”
The Jonas Brothers
Chelsea has poked fun at the Jonas Brothers many a time, most notably with a February 2010 skit in which Taylor Swift (played by Chelsea) visited the brothers backstage before one of their shows, bragging about how she’s going to find dudes without purity rings.
Paris Hilton
In 2009, Jenny McCarthy and Chelsea Handler shared the story of an encounter with Paris Hilton at the Bravo A-List Awards. It wasn’t complimentary. Beforehand, Chelsea quipped, “I’ve actually met her before but she doesn’t know when she’s met someone before ’cause she’s so stupid.”
I’m not a big fan of Chelsea, I think she can seem quite bitter and unfunny at her jokes some times but I’m not going to lie some of these did make me laugh.
The new music video for Rihanna‘s ‘S&M’ has finally been released and you can check it out right here. Once again she teamed up with Melina Matsoukas, who also directed her videos ‘Rude Boy,’ ‘Hard,’ and ‘Rockstar 101.’
Once again with Rihanna videos this isn’t what I hoped for, she looks good but since the song is about S&M it could have been way sexier. In the video she also walks Perez Hilton on a dog leash and whips him on the lawn.
Perez Hilton passes on speculation that Ricky Gervais, who starred in the British original version of “The Office,” will reprise his role of David Brent and replace Steve Carrell on the American version of the show.
THIS is brilliant!
And frankly, it’s the only plausible way to keep the show going after Steve Carell signs off in May!
Now that the actor plans to retire his character, Michael Scott, on the HIGHlarious show The Office, producers are scrambling to figure out how exactly to continue the series in his absence, and they’re reportedly toying with the idea of bringing in the man that started it all – Ricky Gervais’ horiffically uncomfortable David Brent from the original, UK series!
Effing AMAZING! Inspired!
And think about the built-in fanbase that would tune in just to see Gervais play that awful character again! It would COMPLETELY revive the series!
Executive Producer Paul Lieberstein is toying with the idea, and says:
“We talked about it today for a while. It’s not the leading idea… [but] it’s not a dead idea. I don’t know how David Brent could take Michael Scott’s place because it would be a little bit too much of a coincidence that a documentary crew was also following him. He was also fired for incompetence [in the U.K. Office], so we’d have to create some back story for what happened. There would be some things to deal with. On the flip side, you have someone who’s incredibly talented and who has played with a level of realism that’s the same as our show. It wouldn’t be like we would be taking a character from Cheers, like Norm, and putting him in the show. If Dunder Mifflin needed to replace Michael Scott, they’d consider both internal and external candidates. And we will show them considering both. We’ll kind of start [the replacement process] and put it in motion. I don’t want Steve to go, and if he decides he wants to stay, I will be very happy with that.”
And Gervais himself seems to be against it, but who the eff knows if he’s serious or not when he says:
“As David Brent would say, ‘Been there, done that, bought the T-shirt …’ As I would say, ‘Why would I get up at 6 a.m. five days a week for seven years when I can hire someone else to do that and still get my syndication money?’”
We think they SERIOUSLY need to consider this option if they want to keep the show alive!
That Gervais is denying the rumor doesn’t make it untrue. Regardless, I agree with Hilton that the idea is “brilliant” and “inspired.”
For whatever reason, while I very much enjoy Carell’s other work — and love Dilbert and the “Office Space” movie — I’ve never liked “The Office.” The characters just fall flat for me and the plots seem contrived. But I realize that’s a minority view.
And, in any case, Gervais is an extraordinarily talented fellow and completing the circle in this way would be a classic move.
I might talk a lot of crap about Miley Cyrus, but the fact is, she’s still 17. So WTF is Perez Hilton doing posting an image of her naughty bits on his Twitter account?
The picture has since been deleted by Tinypic, but I am betting that several people downloaded it and it’ll be flooding the internets within a day or two. Miley is of legal age in Canada and several other places around the world, but this picture was taken in America. Which means that Perez Hilton’s fat ass should be arrested. Unfortunately, he probably won’t be. Maybe there will be a lawsuit or something and this will turn into a much bigger deal than it should be, but that’s just how it is in Hollywood.
I’m sure his defense will be that she shouldn’t have been going commando in the first place, but whatever. She’s not the smartest person on the planet, but that doesn’t give some fat douchebag the right to plaster her underage vagina all over the internet.
Source: Miley Cyrus Upskirt Posted by Perez Hilton [Allie is Wired]
Oh lord, the Twihards are going to go nuts about this one.
Fans of the Twilight movies were broken hearted over the first Twilight: Eclipse teaser trailer, which really showed nothing at all except Edward and Bella looking at each other and acting like one of them isn’t a 100 year old pedophile.
Rejoice, ye goofy bastards! The new trailer shows all kinds of naked men chests and bad contact lenses. Plus, if you act now, you can get sparkly “vampires” climbing trees for no extra charge! As a bonus, there is a smattering of poorly rendered CGI wolves thrown in the mix!
I read about 20 pages of the first book before handing it back to my ex and saying she needed to grow up, and maybe sat through 10 minutes of the first movie before turning my back in disgust. Although I will admit that I turned back around at one point in the movie. That was when Edward showed Bella what a vampire looked like in the daylight. Thanks for making evil, bloodthirsty creatures look like sparkly pansies. If Perez Hilton was a vampire, that’s what he’d look like. Except fat.
Watching Perez Hilton and Spencer Pratt argue over who is the dumbest media whore between the two is like seeing Tiger Woods and Jesse James fight about who is the most faithful. If Tila Tequila would’ve gotten into this argument, it would have been the perfect storm of idiocy. I’m thinking that it would’ve been the signal for the legions of Hell to pour forth, eradicating this twisted human experiment once and for all.
Perez and Spencer had a bit of a war of words last night on Twitter, and the end result is unintentional hilarity of the epic kind. There is a lot of NSFW language, so click the continue button below if you’d like to see what I’m going to dub The War of the Douchebags.
Perez Hilton is coming to my town, and that makes me very sad. He claims to be throwing a “truly epic” party that will be the “unofficial end of SXSW that everyone MUST attend”.
Bleh.
South by Southwest has always been an incredible event here in Austin, showcasing indie talent from around the world and featuring some major headliners. Austin gets absolutely packed during this time of year, and it’s standing room only pretty much anywhere you go. I am frankly a bit pissed off to see some media whore sleazebag like Perez Hilton claiming to be throwing “the hottest party in all of Austin”.
No, dipshit, the hottest party in all of Austin would be SXSW.
I love the wording on his post, also… it almost makes it sound like he and his crew are running SXSW. What a bag of douche.
Anyway, if you’re a fan of Perez, and whatever crappy thing he has going on there, you can win passes to his “epic” event on his site. I kind of want to go, so that I can make him cry on video again, but I won’t say how I would like to do that. I don’t want to get sued.
Sandra Bullock is very hot for an old broad but her Valentine’s Day evening will be very cool after she burned herself “down there” dying her pubic hair.
Sandra Bullock burned herself dying her pubic hair.
The actress – who is married to motorcycle enthusiast Jesse James – admits she was horrified when her special Valentine’s Day grooming efforts went wrong.
She explained: “I decided for Valentine’s Day I would do a special hair thing. I wanted to try to create a pink heart shape with my lower hair. It was painful.
“You had to bleach it first. There’s something about bleach that feels like acid. Then I had to shave it. I was in so much pain, but I kept going and put the pink dye on and it went the wrong colour.”
The 45-year-old star also suffered another dyeing disaster when she went blonde recently for her role in The Blind Side because Jesse hated it.
She admitted to Britain’s OK! magazine: “There is a very important person in my life who just didn’t want me being blonde – thank God.
“There was a big person who said, ‘I don’t like the blonde on you, take it off. You want him to say that.’ You want him to say that. You do.”
I can’t vouch for Jesse but, really, once Sandra Bullock is naked and showing off her vajajay, the deal is pretty much sealed. You’d got to admire the extra effort but, really, going for the pink, heart-shaped public hair is overkill.
Perez Hilton, who dies his own hair pink (hopefully, just that atop his head) gives it a “WOW! And OUCH!” and suggests Sandra head to a professional.
Celebitchy provides helpful advice for do-it-yourselfers:
If you’re interested in dyeing your pubic hair, there’s a safe range of dyes called “Betty,†as in “Brown Betty,†“Blonde Betty,†etc., that are specifically designed for that purpose. Their website says that the products are all natural and contain no ammonia or parabens. I’m not sure how comfortable and effective Betty is, but it has to be better than getting burnt by chemicals. There’s even a pink version. I prefer to get rid of the hair down there when possible and would never consider dyeing it, but to each their own. Poor Sandra. If this story is true I hope her mons is healed in time for Valentine’s day!
Evil Beet is soliciting readers to see if they can top Bullock’s story.
Source:Â Â “Sandra Bullock burned herself dying her pubic hair ” – TVNZ via WeSmirch.
