Complex have thrown together a list of what they think is the top 10 butterfaces (ugly face but hot body) out there and I agree with every single one of them.
10. BROOKE HOGAN
This is Hulk Hogan’s kid. Rubbing up against this girl is the equivalent to rubbing up against Hulk Hogan. With a boob job. Number 10, as in ten cocktails deep before we cross the line on this one.
09. BUFFIE THE BODY
She’s got an ass like that, but that whole “getting to know you†thing isn’t really in the cards. This is why rap videos choose quick cuts over slow motion pans.
08. TIFFANY “NEW YORK†POLLARD
Holy crap, how did she fit that much saline in those things?! We would gladly take a nap on those “Weird Science†two’s as long as she promised to cover her tranny face with a ski mask.
07. CHLOE SEVIGNY
The thing about Sevs is that she’s not trying to trick you with a bunch of hooker makeup. She is what she is, and gets her fame from that awkward face. And it works. Not saying we’re going to look up, but it works.
06. MELANIE “SCARY SPICE†BROWN
Her great body got her a workout video deal, but her face…come on baby, there was a reason why they chose five Spice Girls instead of just one. It’s called the “Spice Girls Conspiracyâ€â€”word to Barney Stinson.
05. TILA TEQUILA
We’re pretty sure one of our staff members had sex with Ms. Tequila down in Cancun back in March. We still don’t know how she has her own TV show, but that whole bisexual-in-a-bikini thing works well for the Queen of Myspace, even if her face does look like a Mogwai. Just don’t feed her after midnight!
04. LIL’ KIM
Dancing With the Stars has done her body good, but the years of botox, collagen, and plastic surgery have left her formely cute face pretty fucked up. Hopefully she stops now.
03. FERGIE
A butterface list isn’t a proper butterface list without good ol’ dose of meth-slamming Black Eye-d Peas front woman Fergie. She’s an icon—the Marilyn Monroe of Butter Faces.
02. VIDA GUERRA
We’ve been looking at this photo for five minutes and we still don’t see her face. But still, we’re happy that she’s breaking out of the “video chick†mold. In fact, we would gladly support her aspiring music career if she could figure out a way to rap out of her ass like Jim Carey. Stupid choice IMO, I think her face is okay. Far from a Butterface.
01. LADY GAGA
Sure, she suffers from horse face, but Gaga won our hearts with that shelf-ass and her ability to move like a stripper. But a word of advice: don’t wear outfits that cover up your bangin’ body with a sea of Muppets. We love you baby, but you dress like a dickhead.
Thoughts?
Popularity: unranked [?]
Robert Pattinson & Kristen Stewart Hooking Up? – PopEater
Scott Weiland’s Estranged Wife Is Publishing A Memoir – F-Listed
Lily Allen Sunbathing Topless – The Superficial
Kim Kardashian Forgives Eminem – Pacific Coast News
Megan Fox Doesn’t Care What You Think – Celebrity Smack
Adam Lambert Comes Out Of The Closet – Holy Moly
Nicolas Cage Is Beweaveable – City Rag
Anne Hathaway Stuffs Her Pants – Celeb News Wire
Sandra Bullock Has A Prude Nude Scene – Fatback Media
Wanna Lick Daniel Craig? – Celeb Warship
Bikini MILF Babysitter: Kate Gosselin – Ninja Dude
OctoMom Slams Kate Gosselin – ICYDK
Suri Cruise Is Still Adorable – Websters Is My Bitch
Tara Reid Is Tragic – Yeeeah!
Celebretard Showdown: Speidi Vs. Jon and Kate – College Candy
Vida Guerra In Maxim Magazine – The Bastardly
Lindsay Lohan Wreaks Havoc Wherever She Goes – Socialite Life
Jennifer Love Hewitt Wants To Get Married! – Hollywood Dame
Katie Couric Mocks Sarah Palin – Celebitchy
Pamela Anderson Needs To Stop Melting – The Dirty
Paris Hilton Was Sacha Baron Cohen’s First Choice – Anything Hollywood
Photos Surface Of Chris Brown & Rihanna In Bed – Allie Is Wired
Popularity: unranked [?]
It’s happened to all of us. You see a chick with long luscious legs. Right above those is a tight, firm rear. Next is their slim waist and chiseled abs. And then comes the breasts. Either large and augmented or natural and perky, it doesn’t matter, they all have them and they are spectacular.
But then she turns around or you get a good look at her face and it makes your stomach turn. Collagen swollen lips, cheeks tucked into foreheads and man-like features are enough to disappoint any man. It’s the butterface.
10. Hilary Swank
She was in Boys Don’t Cry where she won an Oscar for playing a man in a movie. That pretty much assures that you won’t be on Victoria’s Secret short list for their next Angel. But when you sculpt your body into a machine with chiseled abs, tight ass, and toned everything, men will take notice. Too bad getting your next Oscar makes you perfect as a look-alike for a butch chick boxer.
9. April Scott
Nothing can compare to April’s long legs, a spectacular ass and great tits in a g-string and push-up bra. Too bad the compliments end there. She’s yet another “model†who’s posed in too many face flattering over-the-shoulder shots. Her claims to fame are b-listed to no end. Only thumb-nailed shots trick you into thinking she’s actually hot.
8. Haylie Duff
The gene pool in this family got a little shallow after younger sister Hilary graced us with her presence. Poor, poor Haylie got the short end of the stick when it came to the neck-up department, and is doomed to forever be Hillary’s older, uglier sister. But with her smoking body she’s assured a pity lay by some B-actor and continued “fame.â€
7. Christina Ricci
When your first major role is on the Addams Family as Wednesday, you know you’re going to make this list. Peel the Goth gear away though and she’ll make any man howl. She showed what she had in Prozac Nation and her all-natural body isn’t as scary as her face. There’s no wonder why Samuel Jackson would slap a leash on her and keep her as a pet. Now that’s what I call reparations.
6. Lisa Rinna
This Former Days of Our Lives cast member and more recently “contestant†on Dancing with the Stars certainly has a body that won’t quit. And for being 43 and popping out two kids, her body is one of the best in the business. Too bad she couldn’t resist buying some DSLs that make her face look utterly busted and ridiculous.
5. Rebecca Loos
Rebecca is more proof guys think with their other, smaller head. As personal assistant to billionaire David Beckham, it’s clear what two credentials got her hired. That, and the fact that she’s openly bisexual. Taking that into consideration it’s easy to forgive Beckham for not looking directly at her face when he hired her.
4. Tori Spelling
With a face like hers only two things could get her a big break on a show filled with beautiful people: her smoking body and her last name. But there she is, cast as the ugly best friend the other hot chicks in Beverly Hills confide in. Only a paper bag makes her bangable – that and the piles of money daddy gave her.
3. Vida Guerra
With a body (and ass) like hers it’s easy to forget what Vida actually looks like. But inevitably, one’s eyes wander above the torso and neck area and after that it’s game over. Once again, cunning photographers put her best asset forward while keeping her looking over her shoulder in that all too familiar busted-face pose. She better watch out, the guy with the ugly stick is still right behind her.
2. Carmit
The only Pussycat Doll that could make you say me-ewww once you got a good look at her. It’s a good thing they keep her at or near the back of the pack. Even her magazine “glamour†shots conveniently place her in the busted-face over-the-shoulder-ass-protruding pose. She is living proof that sometimes talent and a smoking body alone can make you a sex symbol.
1. Fergie
Fergie started as the hot chick in the Black Eyed Peas and was the only reason to sit through one of their music videos. Her dancer inspired body is one of the hardest and hottest in the music and entertainment industry. Now her solo career has thrust her into the limelight and it’s way too bright. Besides her gnarly man-hands, the good doctor got a tad ambitious with all the nips, tucks and peels, making her look downright scary.
source: Top 10 Celebrity Butterfaces [double viking]
Popularity: 4% [?]
Swimsuit model Vida Guerra claims she could have gotten out of a parking ticket in West Hollywood last night if she would have forked over some naked pictures.
The same two parking cops who gave Hayden Panettiere a ticket a few days before, put one on the white Range Rover of Guerra. When Vida got back to her ride, she claims the officer said he would let her off if she gave him some naked pictures of herself.
Vida took the ticket, claiming she didn’t have any pics of that sort on her. Officer, just google her on the internet. Not much is left to the imagination.
Source: “Vida: Officer Nailed My Ass, Asked to See It” [tmz]
Popularity: 15% [?]
Jeff Bercovici reports that the US edition of FHM is going out of business.
FHM, the six-year-old beer-and-babes magazine, is shutting down. Emap, which publishes the 1.25-million-circulation title, announced the move this morning. “The decision is consistent with the group’s strategy of focusing resources on faster growth platforms and has been taken in light of the difficult trading conditions in the U.S. market,” says a release from the company, which sold its other U.S. titles to Primedia in 2001. “The U.S. online site … which forms an important part of the brand’s ongoing and increasing international presence, will continue to operate.”
While the British version of FHM is No. 1 among so-called “lad” magazines in the UK market where it originated, its American offshoot never approached market-leader Maxim in popularity (possibly in part owing to Maxim owner Felix Dennis’s decision to launch a flanker
With so much competing content available on the Internet, I’m surprised that any of these magazines survive.
Popularity: 13% [?]
